ALoners: People Who DON’T Need People…


…despite the claims of the popular tune, actually, AREN’T the luckiest people in the world! I’ll explain further below. But first…

the comment to the Psychology Today article  Sophia Dembling Sophia Dembling The Introvert’s Corner that sparked my response:

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(Now my response):

“People who don’t need people, however, ARE the luckiest people in the world, for those of us who can also manage crowds, large or small, are best equipped for every possible scenario–of which there are only two–alone and not alone.

We the “ALoners”, have faced our alone selves and liked it, or can at least can deal with it with grace.

We ALoners realize that we ARE the ONLY people in the world who will ALWAYS be with us. What twisted turn of fate or distraction leads some to fear facing the one thing from which they cannot escape?! Themselves. Like a child in the pre or post high-noon sun trying to escape their shadow. The only method of detachment is to jump, and as if to explicitly demonstrate the futility of such an exercise, the immutable laws of our world invariably and incessantly re-attach us to our dark friend.

Even as the world turns from its light to face its dark side at dusk, it too demonstrates the futility and utility in denying the one or the other. And even in that, our shadows sit idly by mimicking us. Hauntingly appearing and disappearing ever so faintly as we dip in and out of the light. It never leaves us. It is always there.

So I regularly and proudly proclaim my natural inclination to introversion, introspection and aloneness, even if I do also enjoy the company of others.”

Now, if we look at a few of the lyrics of the popular tune associate most with Barbara Streisand, we can see that it pre-disposes, to later make its case, that people alone are somehow incomplete.

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The lyrics as a whole, seem to be playing on the actual truth that humans are, by nature, social creatures. But even-so, we are social creatures who cannot guarantee the company of any other creature–and in that are inherently susceptible to bouts of aloneness.

To not be equipped for this, or even to be only equipped for one or the other; the company of people vs. aloneness, is to be susceptible to states of mental malady like the depression mentioned in the initial response to the Psychology Today article.

Me thinks Barbara and her extroverted cohorts doth protest too much.